Thoughts Activation Day Morning

I realized last Wednesday morning (the day before my surgery), as I drove up to the regular Wednesday noon Eucharist and prayer service, that I was no longer scared. I wasn't even nervous. I just felt happily, quietly at peace. It was a wonderful feeling. The outlook of going deaf hadn't changed--it was my heart and mind that had changed. I had done my work of grieving and of acknowledging my fear, and I was ready for my surgery. It was a very satisfying feeling.

Morning of the surgery, i was so happy! I couldn't stop smiling. I pulled the same trick, telling everyone, "I'm a preschool teacher. You have to let me take your picture for show and tell." One person said, "Well, if it's for little kids, that's ok. I just don't want my picture ending up on YouTube!"

Last night was my first time to join a live chat on www.HearingJourney.com -- my CI manufacturer's peer support website. It was fun. Trading stories about waiting for activation, talking about who's going bilateral, who's going for a mapping in someone else's city and can they meet up for coffee at the airport. They really know each other, and I know many of them from reading their blogs.

Now it is time to go downtown for MY activation. The doctor will remove the staples first. I think there's only maybe five of them? The incision seems to be about 2/3 the size of the last one, and I was told it was small! I have my camera in my bag, and I have my black/blue/green/yellow eye covered with a few layers of makeup! (I have to be a little vain since people want me to post this on YouTube...!) So off we go!

Day Five Post-Op

I'm still really tired. I am walking without holding on to the wall every step, but I sometimes suddenly figure out I'm not quite perpendicular to the floor and kind of lurch back into balance. My stomach has calmed down a LOT but not quite all the way. And I'm still sleeping several hours during the day. I am a bit impatient to get my energy back. I don't remember being this tired last time. So I'm having to talk myself out of feeling guilty for needing the rest--fortunately Joe totally echoes the positive message that I don't have to be doing anything, rest is what I need. He also understands the need to get OUT of these four walls...so we just went to Baskin Robbins for ice cream. What a guy! :D

For now, the big excitement is I get to go take a shower and WASH MY HAIR! Funny what becomes worthy of celebration. :)

Friday is when I get my staples out then go to the audiologist's office for the magical moment of actually activating the implant. I hope I have enough energy by then to be excited about it...

Day 3: Real Food!

I went through and read my blog from when I had my first CI surgery (March 2006). That brought back a lot of memories and gave me a good perspective on how I'm doing this time: just fine. Things are different this time, yes, but not really better or worse in the larger scheme of things. For that I am very grateful.

Today I rested instead of going to church in the morning. That still seems a good call. I took off the Scopolamine patch (pre-surgical anti-nausea treatment) since my dizziness and vertigo seem to be abating somewhat. I saw a list of possible side effects on the sheet they sent home with me: agitation (no), blurred vision (I haven't been wearing my glasses, so, yeah, everything is blurry), dizziness/drowsiness (check), hallucinations (no--thankfully!), skin rash/itching (no) nausea/vomiting (I thought that was what it was supposed to prevent?!?), headache (somewhat), and dry mouth (very much so). So I'm glad to have that off, too.

I've been able to move up to more substantial food, including hard boiled eggs, Fiber One granola bars, a bowl of pudding, and a piece of toast (in addition to the ginger ale, saltines, and canned chicken noodle soup).

So tonight Joe and I decided I needed to get out of the house. I was looking forward to riding around in his convertible! But I was getting dizzy again, so we just went straight to a little restaurant. I saw they offered soup to accompany the entree, so I asked if I could just order the soup--it was chicken noodle! But this was fresh, not canned, with nice big chunks of chicken. I also ordered a baked potato. It all felt good to eat and I feel very nicely satisfied.

That also used up the rest of my energy for the day. I've only used 3 of the Vicodin pills and today switched to just using Tylenol. I don't like the druggy feeling the Vicodin gives me, so it's wonderful to be done with that.

Five more days to getting the staples out and (very likely) getting activated! Last time, we had a backup appointment just in case the incision hadn't healed enough or the swelling gone down enough to get the magnet to stick to my head. We shall see.

And maybe tomorrow I can take the bandaging off! Yay!